A sticky situation

June 28th, 2007

Yesterday a client asked me to smother him with peanut butter.

This was bewildering, but it was not objectionable, either. I gamely put on a pair of gloves, smeared peanut butter on my palms, and clamped them over his mouth.

He squirmed a lot and carried on some vague, muffled roleplay about punishment and begging. “Can’t hear you! No one’s going to help you! You’re just going to have to take it,” I declared, refreshing the peanut butter whenever it looked like it was melting down his chin.

He seemed happy. I couldn’t understand what he was on about, but I’m never too worried about a man whose hands are both free to jerk off.

After twenty minutes or so of this I washed his mouth out with soap. I took him to the bathroom (where he managed to get Listerine on every surface, even the mirror) and then showed him out.

Sessions like this are why I like to call myself a sex worker, not a pro-domme. Peanut butter smothering isn’t dominance or BDSM: it’s a sexual fetish. Trying to call it dominance would make me even more undignified than I generally am.

He came to a dungeon because in the sex work world, “pro-domme” is often a synonym for “fetish worker”. When strip clubs and massage parlors don’t do peanut butter, who else will?

I can already see people shaking their heads about how pro domination is destroying the fine institution of female dominance, one sandwich at a time. I counter that we were never in charge to begin with. I mean really, who appointed us the Grand High Lawmakers of sexuality? We like our capital letters so much, there’s no way we would’ve missed the memo.

10 Responses to “A sticky situation”

  1. 1 Viviane
    June 29th, 2007 at 8:06 am

    Chunky or smooth?

  2. 2 Calico
    June 29th, 2007 at 8:40 am

    Smooth! Skippy. :)

    And a bar of white Dial soap.

  3. 3 Bitchy Jones
    June 29th, 2007 at 8:48 am

    If you cared about me at all, and all my fine institutions you are destroying, you would have written more than *one* *damn* *line* about the soap-mouth-washing.

    (No wonder I’m filled with so much loathing a bile for your kind!)

  4. 4 Bitchy Jones
    June 29th, 2007 at 9:42 am

    Um, this may be unnecessary, but I am very neurotic.

    I meant that last line with a ;)

  5. 5 Calico
    June 29th, 2007 at 10:40 am

    We basically made soap shavings with his teeth. I was hoping for bubbles and sputtering but no luck. Sometimes you can tell when people have never considered the logistics of sucking a large object.

  6. 6 Bitchy Jones
    June 29th, 2007 at 10:59 am

    I have this in mind for someone very, very soon.

    I want him to lick it like a lollipop.

    BJ x

  7. 7 R
    June 29th, 2007 at 2:38 pm

    *snort*
    that’s fantastic!

  8. 8 maymay
    July 3rd, 2007 at 7:14 pm

    I just don’t understand the desire for smooth peanut butter of any brand. And of all that, Skippy’s the worst. This guy needs to take a serious trip down to a health food store. They make peanu butter right there out of real peanuts while you wait. You can even plop it into a plastic cup. I feel like he’d have a really good time. (I do, everytime I go there!)

    But all joking aside, you make a good point. To most people, “pro-domme” doesn’t seem to mean sadist-for-hire, it means sex worker of the “bizarre.” If only more pros (and clients) were more aware of this, I feel like everyone would be better off.

  9. 9 hexy
    July 23rd, 2007 at 7:48 pm

    Quite true. Depending on the context and the service being offered, I refer to myself as a pro-domme, a sadistic top, or simply a professional pervert. :) I’m yet to find one label that covers everything I offer professionally.

  10. 10 Michael
    September 14th, 2007 at 8:42 am

    I was most interested and excited to discover your web site. Thank you and have a good day.

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