Wired Pussy Live Audience
November 3rd, 2007Ooh, looky what I found! This is a trailer for kink.com’s first live audience show. It happened on the Friday I was in town, so I asked if I could go.
“We’re all full.”
“Oh. Really? Please? No? Well, it was worth asking. If anything opens up…”
I had two days to be obnoxious, so finally someone’s guest cancelled as I was riding back from my own shoot. When we got downtown I jumped out of the van, ran to the model apartment to shower off filth and lube, and was just able to suck down a drink before filming. (God, between this and yesterday, y’all will think I’m some kind of lush.)
Donna did an introduction, then began picking up her rope. I could hear a low hum of chat among the audience members. Someone tittered nervously. Delilah sat there in her little outfit with wrap over her eyes, blind, smiling.
Isis Love pitched encouragingly in from the front row. “Tell us what a whore you are, Delilah,” she sang.
“I am a fuckin’ whore,” Delilah responded. She said it with such cheer and enthusiasm, she might as easily have been declaring “I love expensive chocolate”.
You almost make it sound like fun, I thought. I mean, I am a whore, and I do fuck, but wallowing in degradation isn’t chocolate to me.
Ten minutes later I would spit in her face.
It was a shoot that made the rest of us need cigarettes. At every break. They pulled out all the stops for her: electrified dildos and butt plugs and sticky pads, the violet wand, the cattle prod. For the last scene there was even a fascinating little level that shocked pads on her breasts when she lowered her arm. She got fucked in the ass hard enough to make me cringe, and fucked by an enormous fucking machine, and of course enough cattle prod to convince a cow to suck cock.
Now, I am a total wuss about electricity, but even were I not, I do not think I could have done what Delilah did on that shoot. Bondage models are supposed to be perfectly bendable, foldable, beat-to-a-pulp-able; and I am, but only the latter, and never with equanimity. I would have gotten upset about the pain, and cried, and then my face would have gone all tomato-y, and half the audience would have walked out muttering about what sickos we were. Bad scene.
They don’t like their models to cry at Kink. I understand that, but it annoys me. (What, it’s fine for you to beat me, but not for me to cry about it?) I cry easily when I am upset. When I am on set with my perfect makeup fixed and hot lights on and grips scrambling about, ropes and winches and clamps and whips, heartbeat pattering, hyperventilating, camera rolling, moaning, coming — well. Let me confess I’m a little excitable then. I’ve practically developed my own neurosis about it (I don’t sub much, so I have time to work up nerves). I worry on set, not that they’re going to do something extra-special evil, but that I won’t be able to take it appropriately. I see all my suffering in the shoot as a personal fault, and if it’s hard, I think, maybe I shouldn’t be doing it.
Imagine you’re the “model” for a minute. You’re having intense experiences, which in other paradigms could be considered… oh, I dunno, transformative and life-changing. (Even for seasoned pros, sometimes… I think about Sarah Jane Ceylon, telling me how she cried on her last day at The Training of O because she didn’t want to leave.) Some people spend their entire lives dreaming about being stripped before twenty strangers, bound, and forced to their knees on the cold stone of a dungeon floor. Sure, it’s a job. It’s also real pain, real sex and real submission. Not only are you having the kind of sex that thousands of jealous people whack off to, you’re trying to act like this is perfectly normal.
I try to communicate that this is what I love, and that I want what I love to be okay, and that is (part of) why I do porn. But “okay” doesn’t always mean “easy”. In glossing over these shoots, I even convince myself.
For the record, it’s not easy. And Delilah Strong is a fucking champ.
November 3rd, 2007 at 11:54 pm
Hi, I’m one of those thousands. As a long time, off and on subscriber to Kink’s websites, I really love the insight you give to the other side of the rope/camera/monitor. I’ve always been interested in hearing about the perspective of the models, at a real level, and not just fluff, especially the kink.com’s models. Not to be too much of a salesman, but they always have seemed to produce a very professional, very real, product. And they seem to treat the models well (aside from the beatings and pain, since so many of them seem to develop long term relationships with the company. Thanks again for the insight.
And also, it’s too bad they don’t let you cry. And it would be pretty hot.
Joe
November 4th, 2007 at 10:01 am
Hi Joe, thanks for reading!
They do treat their models very well, and they make great product. That’s why we keep coming back.
There are a lot of things that no site currently does (in the U.S., on film, that I know of) that I’d love to see done. Girls crying, watersports, medical play, blood. I know they’ve test-shot a couple of these things at Kink but ultimately decided they were all way too hard-core.
I get that. Porn cannot be all for me. And I don’t like being in the same room as a cattle prod.
November 4th, 2007 at 11:31 am
Hello Calico
Recently discovered yr site. Most enjoyable. I look forward to the new posts.
About Kink: I’ve been following them for *ages*. So much good stuff. Yesterday, when I went by, I checked the new gallery at Device Bondage, and discovered that itfeatured a namesake of yours. Really cute girl. Namesake only, not doppelganger. She’s clearly sub.
Keep up the good, er, bad, work…
Yrs in pervery, Adrian
November 4th, 2007 at 12:41 pm
I know! What’s that crazy chick with my name doing? She’ll give me a bad reputation.
November 4th, 2007 at 2:53 pm
Hi Calico,
Just found your site- saw you recently came to NYC from Boston. I did the same thing about 18 months ago. Looks like you’re already in the groove here, though! Welcome, and good luck with all your endeavors.
November 4th, 2007 at 2:57 pm
I agree. *Shocking!*
November 4th, 2007 at 11:40 pm
Marcelle, thanks for the welcome and the well-wishings!
Confessional time? I discovered your blog just on Friday, when I was link-surfing and bemoaning the evil that is dating. Then suddenly it was 3am and I had read your entire archives.
I’m getting into the groove here in NYC, but slowly. It’s a big city.
November 6th, 2007 at 10:07 am
Hello Calico
As I think you know, I only came by yr blog for the first time a couple of days ago. But now that I’ve read yr posts for Sept & Oct, I realise that the two Calicos are in fact one and the same. Must say, I greatly enjoy both manifestations. Kink’s pix can only be described as *delicious.* And this blog is a great read.
Onwards & sideways!
Yrs in pervery, Adrian
November 6th, 2007 at 9:46 pm
Oh, my, I thought you were just being sarcastic earlier!
As far as I know there’s no other Calico. I switch.
November 9th, 2007 at 10:36 am
Sigh its interesting how many people want to be where she was.
November 9th, 2007 at 10:40 am
Oh, I was jealous, I just think I couldn’t hack it!