In Summer I Type Slower
August 16th, 2007I am not being productive here this week.
Last weekend I had excuses: a nude beach, a playparty, a tea party of sex bloggers. I got sick, and took Monday off work to let my tonsils fight amongst themselves. I worked Tuesday night (I never work nights), had a photoshoot Wednesday, worked Wednesday night (ugh! hate working nights!), and woke up groggy around noon today. Just in time to work another night!
I have about twenty snotty things I want to post, but they each refuse to become self-contained. An overview: Bad reasons to see a sex worker. Why I make the porn I do, and if my sexual motivations are dangerous — or necessary. The type of porn I wish existed (I think it only does in eastern Europe). The website I want to shoot for, and probably shouldn’t. A doubtless ill-advised little essay on why kinky folk hate pro-dommes so much when we do not turn equal venom toward other sex workers, like porn performers and prostitutes.
But for now, I’m just stuck.
Some upcoming events of note:
I will be attending the Boston Fetish Fair Fleamarket this weekend. The summer Flea is primarily a vending event, but I love to catch up with friends, as I used to live there.
Rita comes to TES on Tuesday and teaches lapdancing — as it relates to D/s and tease and denial!
And registration is closed, but I will also be at The Floating World the weekend after.
August 16th, 2007 at 1:03 pm
I’ll be at the Boston Flea too. Oh, something random I came across: http://www.newscientist.com/article.ns?id=dn2923
August 16th, 2007 at 4:14 pm
Oh, you are? Can I reach you at that email address? (don’t worry, it’s only visible to me)
Re: article, it’s good I don’t have naturally red hair then.
August 16th, 2007 at 4:32 pm
Yeah, but I check my gmail account which you have a lot more often, it’s easier reach me through that. The one I listed there is my secret one that no one…can connect to me. Whoops. I’d make the worlds’ worst secret agent.
August 20th, 2007 at 11:56 am
That is a pretty cool article. I do have naturally red hair, so that’s quite intriguing.
Also, sounds like a number of interesting posts in the pipeline. Looking forward to reading them.
September 7th, 2007 at 7:27 am
People probably hate Pro Dommes as opposed to other sex workers because they are making money out of sexual repression to a higher extent than the others. Pro Dommes who not only Pro but put some effort into the liberation of the Female Domination dynamic tend to be the more well looked upon. Many Pros are just there for the money.
September 18th, 2007 at 8:50 pm
“why kinky folk hate pro-dommes so much ”
I for one am glad there are Pro Dommes, if there weren’t it would make it even harder for me to find a Domme for a relationship. If anything, Pro Dommes help me by taking out the competition that are only looking for a little kinky play now and then. The pros that most are hostile to are those that pose as someone looking for a relationship and lead a sub on until the last minute and then require a tribute just to meet. It happens from time to time…..yet another reason I’ve been going to more and more lifestyle events and trying to stay off of alt and collarme…..trying
September 19th, 2007 at 10:41 am
In a way I have thought about it like that myself nycbadboy1. Like the Pro Dommes just do their thing and keep all the crap Im not interested in away. Then again its just horses for courses seeing as Pro Dommes exist because of the lack of Dommes.
On the other side of that statement however is how Pro Dommes and financial interests often piss and shit all over Femdom like Hitler on a bad day not that they would admit it. Femdom is so “Male subs penis” orientated that I cant see it appealing to Dommes that much and the huge financial interests are conducive to this. Its a bit like how Pro Dommes often use male subs in their films for profit. Often they dont pay the subs becuase there is so much demand for Domination that they dont have to pay them and there are enough subs out there willing to do it free (to save some money on Pro Domming no doubt). Then what you are left with is a product that caters only to male submissives with glorious young uber Dommes dressed in Latex and male subs who are just an incidental instrument to the whole thing. Thats probably a good example of what I say above with regards to how things dont often seem to be that much catering to Dommes.
Fairly recently Pro Dommes even started to advertize for business on my own personal profile on another site through the comments and contact list section. So a bit like me slapping myself up on a Pro Domme website/profile advertizing my business.
They are prostitutes but the fact its not conventional sex makes them think otherwise. So a protitutes wanks you off for money and a Pro Domme ties your balls up for money. Different means to an ends, same thing.
September 19th, 2007 at 6:58 pm
nycbadboy1 -
You have a point that there’s a difference in the sort of man who pays. I don’t even think they’re your competition. The sort of man who needs discretion (or wants a quick thing on his terms) is not seeking an out-and-proud dominant woman to date.
See, we’re a social service.
Hiya - Do you read Bitchy Jones? I hope you do.
But I don’t think pro-dommes exist because of the lack of “real dommes”, anymore than prostitutes exist because of the lack of real women.
October 1st, 2007 at 1:06 pm
But I don’t think pro-dommes exist because of the lack of “real dommes”, anymore than prostitutes exist because of the lack of real women.
Borderline insulting to women, actually real women arent always defined as being there just for sex or at least they shouldnt be. Pro Dommes are sociological hitch-hickers and they exist for the most part due to the lack of Dommes.
Its just a fact. sorry
October 1st, 2007 at 1:13 pm
Here is the good news however:
I found this site very interesting;
The bits I read so far with some extracted quotes:
http://www.sensualism.com/sex/index.html
quote: “In general, the researchers found that women who thought their answers might be seen by others tended to give answers that were more socially acceptable than did women who thought they were connected to a lie detector”
quote: “The study showed more differences between men and women in sexual attitudes than in sexual behavior”
quote: “Our results may reflect currently shifting gender roles in which women don’t feel as strong a need to meet certain expectations about their sexual behavior”
http://www.sensualism.com/beauty/index.html
I already knew this:
http://www.sensualism.com/beauty/handsome.html
Because I’m not stupid and I already noticed that as it is now, women are mostly “looks” bred. Just go to your local nightclub.
So does this basically mean that equality between the sexes in the future means that everyone will be good looking seeing as they will both be perceived as sex objects equally, hence equally “looks” bred? I can just imagine a sextopia of rubberclad orgies in space with lazer dildos.
Quote: “She says that changes were probably driven by choosy females who began to demand handsomeness, not brute force. Receding canines”
Of course this has absolutely nothing whatsoever to do with Dommes directly but it is the changing sociology of the world behind them. If it keeps going this way like it has in the last 100 years such as womens rights to vote etc then the more Dommes there will be as these are the social factors that allow them to end their lives of sexual chastity. When it gets more like that then Pro Dommes will have some more respect becuase they wont be able to afford not to have respect as many of them dont now.
Upon reading it, it seems quite intelligently written and the sources cited on the top are valid.
October 1st, 2007 at 1:27 pm
The better looking the Pro Domme the less chance of a decent relationship she has unfortunately.
http://www.sensualism.com/beauty/index.html
That’s an interesting read. Take note of long-term goals, short-term goals and rational discounting. The average IQ is 100 so maybe you can work it out maybe you cant, who knows. Yes we / I know you are “real people” and as one you deserve a real person. It’s just that within the social environment you are a commodity person or not and to a great extent that matches the illiberal and repressed attitudes of this world. Its called demand and supply, remember that one? Good girls. The short- term relationships you are going through are the juxtaposition of the way you portray yourself by diametric principals via lines of sociology.
Then again I suppose you wouldn’t know what it feels like to Dominate a submissive male who actually feels Dominant when he does it.
Dommes call them “pleasure slaves” but 50 hours for free will never cut it. Completely uninhibited and Dominating you with orgasms with little / no sexual contact, I’m not joking either.
October 1st, 2007 at 1:29 pm
The better looking the Pro Domme the less chance of a decent relationship she has unfortunately.
http://www.sensualism.com/beauty/pretty-women.html
That’s an interesting read. Take note of long-term goals, short-term goals and rational discounting. The average IQ is 100 so maybe you can work it out maybe you cant, who knows. Yes we / I know you are “real people” and as one you deserve a real person. It’s just that within the social environment you are a commodity person or not and to a great extent that matches the illiberal and repressed attitudes of this world. Its called demand and supply, remember that one? Good girls. The short- term relationships you are going through are the juxtaposition of the way you portray yourself by diametric principals via lines of sociology.
Then again I suppose you wouldn’t know what it feels like to Dominate a submissive male who actually feels Dominant when he does it.
Dommes call them “pleasure slaves” but 50 hours for free will never cut it. Completely uninhibited and Dominating you with orgasms with little / no sexual contact, I’m not joking either.
October 1st, 2007 at 1:30 pm
Sorry the link in post number 11 was wrong. 12 has the correct one.